"No uterus, no opinion"

When I started writing this, I wasn't writing it for everyone to read

I was writing it for myself, a way to let things out and express myself.

My mind was racing and as soon as I sat down at the computer I couldn't stop typing.

I'm choosing to share it because somewhere their is probably another woman going through the same exhausting, never-ending journey with doctors and specialists.

She's sitting at home in pain, all the tests came back normal, and she's starting to feel like a hypochondriac. It's exhausting.

I've been there, and this is my story.

It started in May 2014, and if I was going to go into detail this post would be WAY too long, so for the sake of my own sanity and yours, I'll keep it simple.

The stomach aches started about five years ago, but I still haven't figured anything out there.

In June, Aunt Flo visited...but it wasn't a normal visit, no, she was the worst visit ever

I refuse to get all detailed with this, so let's just put it this way.

It was the WORST visit ever!! She broke everything in my house, burned all my belongings, and kidnapped my dog. She's such a hag.

Okay not really but if you're a girl, you understand.

Well, I never wanted her to visit me again like that so I went to the doc to make sure everything was "cool" he assumed it was my birth control so he put me on a different schedule.

She didn't visit for about 4 months, as a newlywed I should be grateful but I don't like when she just stops visiting. It would've been great if I was pregnant, but that wasn't the case.

I got off my birth control because I figured she'd come around again 

She didn't

Doctors tried to get her to visit me using all sorts of stuff, and nope, she never showed up.

I also wasn't just going back to the doctor to get them to get her to visit me, I was going because of the pain I was still in. No answers...

Blood tests, women's exams, gallbladder tests...etc

Well, my doctor decided maybe I should have an ultrasound

GENIUS

Why didn't he think about this before? Maybe because what I was about to find out on that ultrasound was at least an answer to my pain, but the start of a journey to where I am now.

No it's not as dramatic as it sounds, it could have been worse, and I know that, but for me...it was dramatic.

Especially when you hear the ultrasound tech say "what is that?" 

Oh...you mean you've never seen something like this? Great...

They diagnosed it as a cyst, the size of a grapefruit on my left ovary.

Normal right?

They wanted me to come back in a couple weeks to see if it had disappeared

I don't know a lot about cysts, but I kinda figured unless there was a small troll living inside of me who liked "grapefruit"..that sucker was still going to be there.

Two weeks later, and I was right! It was still there hanging out AND I had a friend on my right ovary- another cyst, but that one wasn't as big- like the size of a golf ball. Meh...

(Depending on this day, this meme has made me laugh, or made me cry)

So, I'm waiting for the Doc to call me and it's been a couple days so I call him back and oh, he's on Vacation. See ya later Doc, have fun basking in the sun... I'll just figure out what to do with this giant grapefruit that's causing me a lot of pain.

Well, for that reason, as well as a few others, I decided to go to the city for a second opinion

I went and saw a specialist and I'm glad I did

That cyst? It's creating a block in my left Fallopian tube, so bad that it might have to be taken out.

Oh and that cyst on my right ovary? It wasn't there anymore!

Seeing a specialist had many pros, but the one con was walking out of that office knowing that I was going to have to have surgery and possibly remove my Fallopian tube and that my fertility was going to be cut in half.

It was a weird day, I couldn't stop thinking about it, and the following week after that

I talked to my husband about it, one day we agreed to get it removed, the next- we thought we might regret taking it out. I mean, once it's gone IT'S GONE. 

 Well, now I'm having surgery on Tuesday.

Removing the tube is the last thing on their list, and they're going to try doing everything they can.

But for now all I can do is have faith that everything will work out, and thank god for an amazing husband like John. Not only has he held me through my worst, but he's taking the days off to spend with me out at the hospital for the surgery, and a few days after. 

I love that man more than words can describe, he's so good to me.

So if  you feel like you're on a never ending medical journey- let me just tell you

it's worth it to find a specialist and do your research. You know your body better than anybody else and trust me, you'll be glad you did. I'm so glad I finally have answers!

I'm a little bit terrified of hospitals, and I've been freaking out about this day

but I'll be back soon & I'll let you know how it went!

If you have had laparoscopic surgery- PLEASE share your tips!